I know Why
Okay so to continue with the saga of my mind driving me crazy...This morning I was driving to work thinking about RB and I called an old friend from high school. She is 3 yrs. older than me and she has always been pushy and bossy. I just wanted to talk to someone. She asked how I was doing and I told her I was having a hard time with it.I told her that Oct.9th was looming over me and she asked why. I told her that was the day I found out he was cheating on me and had another woman. The last time I saw him was the next day on the 10th. 1 yr. without seeing him. 1000 days and I am where? almost to 365.Anyway, she listened and then she told me I needed to get over it and move on. Wow, why didn't I think of that. I told her that was what I wanted and she said I need to realize he doesn't love me he never loved me and all he did was take advantage of me and then move on. I balked at this and told her it would be hard to think of the last 10 yrs. of my life as something cheap and deceitful. I don't believe that, nor do I think it was something you should say to someone who is brokenhearted. Get over it, you don't know what love is because that is not what you had! Whatever! I think I will think twice before calling her back again. She never liked Marshall and felt he kept me from visiting her. He didn't, she is annoying enough on her own to keep me away. Today she is having her lips tattooed brown-the outline of her lips. Is that strange or what? OK enough about her now me. I know why I can't get over him. I hate to say it but I have been thinking of nothing else. I am not over him because, and I hate more than anything to admit it, but, I still love him. Damn it I do. I can't help it. I loved him with all my heart and soul for so long it's like I can't turn it off. I so wish I could but I can't and I am so very tired of trying. I can't drink it away, or eat it away, or smoke it away, or drug it away, or run away from it. It's just there like a big old albatross hanging around my neck. Dragging me down ,down, down. I have good days, yes and I have such good friends in my life. I know all this and believe me they all wish I could get on with my life too. I am so sure they are sick of me whining and moping around. Me too.
Posted by poody at 7:55 AM::
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3 Comments:
The worst thing you can say to someone is "get over it". Ending a long relationship is like mourning a death in a sense. You're not going to have that person in your life anymore and you once loved them. Would you tell someone who lost a loved one to get over it? Well, that's what you get from a brown lip liner tattoo lady! Bah!
Truly you do need to get over it. That is something infinitely easier said than done, and so much easier from an observer's perspective. I agree with S*, but in a sense it's actually worse than death. After death, you can mourn loss and move on because you know you can never be with that person again. With ending a relationship, you have to live with the hurt that is walking around having a life seperate from you and being content without you. It hurts and there is no easy way to "get over it". Only YOU can decide what you have to do, but it is certain you MUST do something to get over the relationship.
that is so right weasel. That is exactly how I feel. It will go on and I will have to get over it because I have no other choice. It is what it is. And Mrs. L I just need to remember not to talk to her when I am down because she is a bitch no doubt.LOL the brown lip liner tattoo lady am I the only one who hasn't heard of such a thing?
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