Thursday, November 30, 2006

Chilly Day

So, it is official Hell is freezing over! LOL Finally I get to use my new central heat! I turned it on this morning before I left and it stunk!The little man and the 2 big dogs are lounging around the house today. I left them all with the TV on the Animal channel and a blanket spread over my bed and the couch.Dooley refused to do "his business" this morning. He just stood at the back slider looking pitiful and shaking like a little rat dog. I told him he better shake a turd out but he alas did not so I am so sure he has already left me some little somethin'somethin'!Last night about midnight we had what my Granmother would call a gully washer of a storm. It was a wicked thunderstorm. I was awakened by the noise and then by Osa jumping up on the bed and getting as close as possible to me and then some. Big baby! Dooley slept thru the whole thing. I am making potato soup for supper tonight. I have a bunch of potatoes and it is good weather for it. Nothing like my Canadian friend Lael who says it is so cold there her eyeballs freeze when she goes outside! Yeh, nothing like that going on here!I am going to try and get my Christmas tree in the house up tonight. I have a 6ft fiber optic tree and my ornaments are so pretty. It is the best part of Christmas to me. I love the lights twinkling and the shiny ornaments looking like jewels. I am still toying with the idea of an upside down Christmas tree outside with baby doll heads hanging off of it. I have several doll heads but not near enough. I may have to continue to collect them and do it next year but I am shooting for this year.Well, I am goofing off at work right now because I am waiting on one of the big bosses to come get me for a meeting. I hate meetings. I am a hands on kind of girl . I am not into talking about my goals. I just set them and then meet them . there ya go, job done, next! I am told I need to work on my customer service skills. What? I have customer service skills?


Wednesday, November 29, 2006

In Honor of Mel Here is your Wordless Wednesday


Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Don't say another word!!

I am so fu**ing over this girl in my space. OMG!! She spent yesterday from 10:30am to 1:30 pm with the big boss who is "training" her. At 1:30 she came into my office and I was on the phone and had my music on(Killers new album). She proceeds to tell me about what she had for lunch. I held a finger up and pointed to the phone in my hand which is the universal sign for I am on the phone now, be with you in a minute. But she doesn't know sign language evidently because she starts speaking louder to be heard over the music she later told me. Note that the person I was talking to from Medicaid said her lunch sounded good to her. After I got off the phone I asked what she had going on and she said nothing right now. I handed her a stack of lab results that had been faxed from the lab and asked her to fax these to the Dr's offices. That was at 1:30. At 4:30 she had yet to fax a single lab. Hello, it takes all of about 15 minutes tops to fax that stuff. It is not rocket science. I bet any of you could have figured out how to do it. She has been here over 3 weeks now and I personally have shown her how to use the fax machine plus she came from an office environment. That brings us to the next issue which is triage. For those of you who do not understand the meaning of the word triage it is just what nurses do with their critical pathway thinking. That means you assess the duties at hand and start with the most urgent or important one. Now, it is very important that labs be given to the Drs. in a timely manner. Like before 4pm. The nurses should be having the lab itself fax results to the Drs but they sometimes forget to put the fax number or the Dr name on the slips.When I left yesterday at 5pm she was still faxing results and when I came in this morning there were 2 labs she never faxed. She said she did them all but those 2 and it was late so she left them for today. But, did she fax them this morning??? Oh hell no! They were still sitting there. I about lost it then and there. I am trying people. I have no tolerance for slackers or dumb assess for that matter. At this point I can only assume she is either not getting because she is a dumb ass or she is not getting because she is going to always want to throw tasks back my way. I mean why learn something if you don't need to? Okay so I feel better now just ventilating my frustration. I have told my boss and her boss that I will no longer be staying at the office every night till 7pm. I will work thru my lunch hour as always and I will be leaving at or about 5pm every work day. I am salaried so just the fact that they get an extra hour of work from me every day galls me sometimes. If I continue to stay late to get my work done then they will see it as i am doing ok and don't need any help. So, as I always say people will rise to your expectations, well in this case I am sinking to the standards set as far as work flow. I am officially on a slow down. I have to. Mentally is is fatiguing and stressful. I need a martini STAT!!!

And wait for it... yep she's still talking to me!!!


Monday, November 27, 2006


So, here I sit back at the "w". Dang it! How come holidays go so fast and every day life is so slow. I had a great few days off. I managed to get some chores around the house finished. I am a very bad housekeeper. I have dust bunnies and dog hair in every corner and there is dust on all surfaces. I hate to clean and it shows. Now, with my cousin living there too I have less storage space for my junk. I need Neicey from Clean House to come and purge me. But she will only come if I live in the Los Angeles area. What Neicey, you think the only people needing a hand live in L.A.? I think not! I am hooked on Maimi Ink. I watched like 4 of them back to back last night. It amazes me the things people will tattoo on themselves. I have been a fan of body art since I first became a nurse. I ahve seen some pretty interesting tattoos in some pretty interesting places. Back when I first got out of nursing school the only people who had tatts were bikers, their women and servicemen. Now, everybody including me have one. And we all have them for differnt reasons. The majority of people who have them get them for a reason, I mean like to mark an event or memorialize someone. I know my little tattoo will keep being added to until I no longer feel the need to mourn and mark my friend's passing.
Enough of that though, back to the day at hand. I am still stuck in the office with the talking woman. She is not as chatty today. She has been given an assignment and I am trying to not listen as she talks her way through it. I have discovered that if I listen to her she will end up just standing back and letting me do the task. I have shown her how to do certain things but it's like she either doesn't get it or she figures she doesn't have to remember. She has no triage skills which is a must for really any nurse as far as I am concerned. I mean that is a huge part of this job is knowing how to direct the staff. If you are unsure or sound like you aren't really sure then it will show in the way you supervise the staff. Most home health nurses are fiercly independent anyway so if they are calling you then it is becasue they are not sure what to do . The last thing they want to hear is I don't know or even hear in your voice that you haven't a clue what to do. Oops now the boss is in here showing her what I showed her like 4 different times last week. It is funny because the big boss who is supposed to be training her is 1)not here 2) when she is here is too busy doing something else 3)she gets here at 11 am and leaves at 3pm 4) teaching method is piecemeal at best. Last week when she spoke to me she said she wanted to talk to me about my concerns. She felt the woman is up to speed with her taks and she asked me where I felt she needed direction. I told her as far as I could see she needed help with using the computer for all tasks like passing Dr. orders, writing a coordination note, how to look at staff schedules, how to page staff, how to email staff, how to look up a Dr. in the database. How to edit database... you get the picture. In other words, she knows nothing and this is her 4 th week here. She still lets her phone ring until they page her overhead to pick it up. WTF??That is enough bitching for now. Back to the grind.


Sunday, November 26, 2006

Mommy's little helpers

this is Chula she is the quiet one. she is a little standoffish in a crowd.
this is the little guy again.He fell asleep on my neck the other night while I was laying on the couch watching the boob tube!

This is Osa. She is sleeping on Dooley's little purple bed. You can see it is a litle too small for her so guess what she will get for Christmas!


Saturday, November 25, 2006

Saturday is Chore day

I slept till 9:45 am this morning.I owuld have slept longer but my phone rang. It was my sister Anna. I haven't talked to her in a few days which is strage in itself because we speak on the phone to each other almost every day. I have a home project to work on today. I have my stereo in a hall closet and I bought some under shelf baskets to hang in there and put the CDs in so I can just pull them out and look. I have over 300 closer to 400 CDs so it is important I have them put away in alpahbetical order.That and cleaning up the guest bathroom so Linda can claim it as her own. I should be busy just about all day.


Thursday, November 23, 2006

Day of Gluttany

Man you gotta love a holiday where you are expected to overeat!I surely did my job of it. I went to my friend Jana's house for Thanksgiving. Very low key. So much good food. Her husband smoked a turkey!I made these sweet potatoes that were sooooo good. Lots of butter,brown sugar, pecans, and cinnamon! Jana made a millionaire pie and strawberry salad and 2 different kinds of dressing. I could go on but you get the picture. We drank holiday punch!Of course there was pecan pie, pumpkin pie, and coconut creme pie. And honey baked ham.... hmmmm hammm!!! I brought home a huge plate of food but it is for myself and my cousin who had to work all day long. She is housesitting for friends who have dogs this weekend. I have the house to myself. It's kind of nice but lonely too. I am so tired and full I think the trytophan in the turkey is kicking in.... Goodnight!


Happy Thanksgiving

A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,"I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"

She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."


Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Holiday Hustle

Today is supposed to be the biggest travel holiday of the year. I have decided to stay in town. I usually go to Dallas-Ft. Worth and leave to go early on Thanksgiving day. I am not in the mood for the car. My knee hurts too bad when I sit in the car too long. Then there is Dooley. He has never travelled that long before either. linda is still moving in and I am of Friday and hopefully can get the place a little more roomate friendly. Hope everyone has a wonderful holiday. I am working a little bit on Thursday just enough to make some $$$


Tuesday, November 21, 2006

For My Friend Gary


Sunday, November 19, 2006

Open House

My Aunt Nancy is an interior decorator. She lives in a small town about 40 mins. outside of Austin in the hill country that supports a lot of artists. The shop she works out of had an open house to kick off the holidays. Every tree,centerpiece,table setting, and wreath was designed by her. She is without a doubt the most creative inventinve person I have ever met. I aspire to be 1/100th as talented as her in any endeavor I undertake. These trees are sold as is and if you have to ask how much they are you can't afford them. Enjoy!


Saturday, November 18, 2006

Move in

Today is the day my cousin Linda moves in. I have been trying to clean out the room she will have today. Just getting the closet cleaned out and the chotskis out. She has more stuff than I realized and so do I! i am taking a break because work called and needed something done on the computer. Now I am waiting for it to process and come back to me. You know magic computer stuff. Not much else to say I think I will stalk some of my favorite blogs while I wait.


Friday, November 17, 2006

Freaky Friday

I am having the worst day ever at work! This is my cigarette break! No, I don't smoke but I had to have a break. I just am overwhelmed by the amount of work I have been doing. We bought out another home health agency and went from 130 pts. to >200. I have been working like crazy and then there is the new person who talks ninety to nothing in my office! Then there was the Dr who had his nurse call me, put me on hold for 5 mins. and then when he got on the phone starts yelling at me! Hold on now! I told him to first off quit screaming at me and tell me his concerns in a rational tone of voice. He got so mad at that he could hardly form words. Who are you to tell me how to act? he asked . I told him I would be glad to assist him if he could calm down and tell me what I could do to make him happy. He told me I was patronizing him. Hello, I'm a nurse! Of course I patronize you ,you idiot! That's what you want me to do! Turns out the problem he had stemmed from office and staff! Nothing I can do about that now is there? Did he apologize for calling me up putting me on hold and then yelling at me like a petulant child??? Well, my teeth are still in my head and if he had done that then they would be on the floor with my jaw! In other words, Drs. act the worst ever to nurses. Not to their patients, family, or other Drs. Just nurses! Like we are some kind of whipping boy! Historically that is their M.O. I need a drink STAT! There are no emergencies in home health! I am trying not to get caught up in the drama unfolding around me,hence this post. If I can verbally vomit out here what I want to say to the next person who comes in my office with an urgent right now request then I will make it till the phone quits ringing at 5pm.Oy vey! I just want to say one thing FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUCK!!! Okay then, that's better! Let me get my game face on because here comes the boss!


Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Myspace-dedicated all my friends on the site-Be Careful out there!

Bag of popcorn to eat on Friday night.... $3.49
Bottle of Coke to wash down the popcorn.....$1.09
MySpace account........Free
Meeting the girl of your dreams on MySpace Friday night and having your mates point out her defect.....PRICELESS


Chow Down at Work

Yummy! We are having our Thanksgiving dinner for work today.The company provides a ham and turkey. Then everyone brings something to the table. It all smells so good and I can hardly wait. I had a pt.'s son call me this morning and he was upset that one of our nurses sent his mother to the E.R. He says she should never have been taken to the hospital. Now they are not going to let her out.(she is in the ICU) He said" that nurse should be fired! She should never have sent my mother to that fucking hospital! Now, people, I know he was upset and I was trying so hard not to laugh because in my mind's eye I saw people in hospital beds performing all kinds of sexual acts. Whole floors like the anal ward or the oral wing! All I know is if there is a fucking hospital then check my ass in! Oh yeah, I need some rehab baby!!


Monday, November 13, 2006

Life and the Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 Hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar . . . and the coffee.
A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with an unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life."
"The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full."
"The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car."
"The sand is everything else--the small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls." "The same goes for life."
"If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you."
"Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play with your children.

Take time to get medical checkups.

Take your partner out to dinner.

Play another 18.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

" One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked." "It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,there's
always room for a cup of coffee with a friend."


Saturday, November 11, 2006

They're Back

The little dogs are back. They were at a neighbor's house. They are alright and happy to be home!


Friday, November 10, 2006

Land of the Free Home of the Brave

I read a blog from a guy in another country regularly.Today I was reading his blog and he said he was going to go to bed and fall asleep watching the 9/11 video. He said he has tried 8 times to watch it but always falls asleep before the end. He said he knows how it ends, plane hits building,building collapses...he like yaddi yaddi yaddied the first attack on American soil! What kind of video is out there anyways? I mean do you get those videos off the TV like the "Girls Gone Wild" videos? Have we become the world's ultimate reality show! I cannot even think about 9/11 without getting very upset. I remember the first few months after the attack feeling sick to my stomach all the time.I had never ever experienced anything so bad.Now first off I realize that you can write whatever you want in your blog and if people don't like it then they can quit reading it. I am all for freedom of speech being an American. I often wonder how the rest of the world views America.The following is what followed after reading this bloggers comment and the way it got be to thinking.The whole 9/11 massacre was for me, the one defining moment, in my generation at least, of when I realized what it meant to be an American. At that moment we were not black or white or republican or democrat or blue collar or white collar or mexican or jewish or muslim or aggie or longhorn or cowboys or businessmen or texan or yankee. We were all those individual things and at the same time we were a part of a collective if you will. The fact that we are all of these things and individually the other things too is what makes us American.Our country may not be perfect Lord knows this.But we have the ability to change and shape our country into what we want it to be. Our foreign policy may suck and believe me I have a problem with the invasion of Iraq as do many Americans. I think we should definitely work hard to figure out how to get our guys home safe and sound. And yea, we do seem to spend too much time butting into the feuds that have been going on longer than the Hatfield and McCoys.But,when these other countries around the world need help whether it be in the form of food, shelter, medical, whatever America's big shoulders are there to prop you up. And God forbid that another country, one of our allies should ever have to suffer something as horrific as 9/11, who would have their back? That's right say it say my name AMERICA!!! So, even though I am and never have been a Bush supporter and I have issues with the way this country is run. The fact that I am an American gives me the right to criticize my government openly without fear of retribution. And if you were here on American soil you could too. That's how we roll!



Akasha the little red weenie dog and the first one to capture my heart has gone missing her and lestat. Adrian came to work this morning crying and upset saying he had been out looking and calling them all night! He said they dug out from under the fence in the backyard. I am so sorry. I told him if he hasn't found them by tomorrow morning I will come over and help him go door to door. If someone has them we can hear them barking when we knock on the door. Wish us luck! He had to go break it to the old folks he visits every Friday with the little dogs. WAH!!


Wednesday, November 08, 2006

My neighborhood

South Austin has it's own flair for art.this guy makes his animals out of metal scraps.Look closer at the 2 dogs tied up in the yard.This guy had 2 problems, first he needed a fence and second he had a lot of downed wooden branches in the yard. My cousin from Chicago says she does not like this look. It is too messy!

This dude just likes chickens!Yep, that is a big chicken in the back yard.

But this one, he is committed to his art. The pictures do not do it justice.It is covered, every inch of it with mirrored bits and pieces.


Tuesday, November 07, 2006

The Holiday Panic

I saw my therapist today. That seems funny to say or even think about having a therapist. It has the connotation that I am crazy. Which well, I am but I really don't think I'm clinically deranged. And neither am I! Anyways, we got to talking about the upcoming holidays! I am sure that this time of the year is her bread and butter season. I was saying how I am not going to go to my mom's house for the holidays because we still haven't spoken. She asked me how the holidays were as a kid growing up. When I went to live with my grandparents as a child I was sent every holiday and summer to stay with my mom. It was horrible! Everyone else was excited about holidays and summer break and I was always freaking out. I think I got to quit going when I was about 12 or 13. I was into smoking dope and dropping acid big time back then and my mom's husband the cop was all over that shit. Funny how I chose to do drugs, like a big old fuck you to him don't you think? The drugs are what actually saved me from having to keep going back there. MMMUUUHHHAAHH!!!!! Today when we talked about it, she asked me if anyone had ever bothered to check and see how I was coping with having to go back and forth like that. I told her I felt a lot like Harry Potter when he has to leave Hogwart's and go back to live with his muggle family. I do remember my aunt who is a school nurse and more of a sister to me being concerned over the fact that she had noticed I had started to repeatedly touch my thumbs to all of my fingers back and forth.I would start to do this every time it got close to going to mom's house. I guess she thought I was OCD or something but I just remember my mom blaming the drugs on the fact that I wouldn't be staying with her anymore. No wonder I kept doing them! Yeah, drugs!Once I was able to stay ome for the holidays I was harassed by another animal known as the visiting son and family.I had 3 married uncles. One of them would come down every other Christmas. The other uncle would come down the alternate Christmas. I got to hear then how lucky I was that my grandparents loved me enough to let me stay with them. Oh yeah, it was always merry fucking Christmas for me! Cut to the adult years, as a nurse I can always say I have to work the holidays sorry can't make it home. Love to all. Now that is a good holiday except you feel cheated that you don't have what you perceive as a Merry little Christmas. My best Christmas ever was once my dearly departed friend Nancy and I went down to San Antonio and stayed in a suite at the St. Anthony Hotel. We walked around on the riverwalk and had a lovely supper at a local place and then went to midnight mass at the cathedral downtown.I remember giving a homeless person my leftovers from the dinner and my friend Nancy said she was so moved that she emptied out her pockets of money. He probably got around 200 bucks and a steak dinner that night. Best we could do on such short notice. The next best Christmas I ever had was when I lived in Hawaii. For some reason I had both Christmas eve and day off. I went to the video store and got all my favorite movies, then I went to the grocery store and I got all my favorite foods and beverages. I spent the entire holiday in my nightclothes.I once told that to a nurse friend and she said she had never heard anything so sad so I quit telling people. It wasn't sad at all. It was stress free and quite comforting. I had presents to open from my friends and family I just chose to open them when I got them instead of waiting.The holidays are not all merry and bright for some people. I happen to be one of them. It is a reminder of what I lack in my life. What is missing and just for the fun of it let's do that say, every fucking year same time okay? So, that was a nice little story now wasn't it?


Shut up already!!

I have a new office mate. She is very nice and sweet. Like a grandma. But ya'll she will not shut up! I am used to being alone and just gettin' 'er done! This lady has to tell you everything she is doing, has done, and will do! And to top it all off she is so nice I can't cuss around her. I tried already. I said muther fucker last week and felt so bad ever since that I haven't cussed once since then!We are supposed to be moving soon to a space with more offices so I am hoping we will split up then. Like I said she is very nice but...


Monday, November 06, 2006

For Memphis Steve-He feels we are all a bunch of Fembots.. and he says this like it is a bad thing!

One day my friend Jana's housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Texas."
And they say blondes are dumb...
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
"I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"
You know I love you Steve!


Sunday, November 05, 2006

Which way are You?

I thought you could all use a little chuckle............

*Martha's Way*
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

*Poody's Way *
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!

*Martha's Way*
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

*Poody's Way*
Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year

*Martha's Way*
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake

*Poody's Way*
Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you.

*Martha's Way*
If you accidentally oversalt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

*Poody's Way*
If you oversalt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me the real woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!"

*Martha's Way*
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

*Poody's Way*
Celery? Never heard of it!

*Martha's Way*
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

*Poody's Way*
The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust so I don't.

*Martha's Way*
Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

*Poody's Way*
Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink!

*Martha's Way*
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

*Poody's Way*
Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

*Martha's Way*
Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

*Poody's Way*
Leftover wine???????????
HELLO !!!!!!!

Only the names have been changed to prtect the innocent!


Thursday, November 02, 2006


25. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
24. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
23. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
22. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
21. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
20. You watch the Weather Channel.
19. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
18. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
17. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
16. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door
won't turn down the stereo.
15. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
14. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
12. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
11. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
10. You take naps.
9. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of
8. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
than settle, your stomach.
7. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and
pregnancy tests.
6. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
5. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
4. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to
drink that much again."
3. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
2. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them
instead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?"

And the number one sign you are getting old is:

1. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that
Doesn’t apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.


Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Dia De Los Muertos

Today is a day of devotion to your ancestors.In Mexico,it is a day to honor your loved ones who have "passed on".It is a holy day of obligation in the Catholic church.
There is a little cemetery around the corner from my house. It is called Our Lady of Guadalupe Cemetery.When I first moved to my house I explored the neighborhood like you do. I went into the cemetery to walk around mainly because it was so beautiful. It is not a cemetery for wealthy people. Quite the contrary I would wager but it is well kept and the graves are obviously tended regularly.The interesting thing was that each grave site had it's own flair. There were big wreaths made of blue and pink plastic flowers brandishing Mi Amor! Or smaller clusters of many different colored flowers like if a child or children had picked and placed them on some sites that read My darling wife,mother,and daughter.The most poignant one was the grave of a little boy. His grave site was filled with his toys. Little matchbox cars and soldiers hiding in the berm.The dates on the marker said his birthday was the next week.It was sad.The very next weekend I was driving by and there in the cemetery next to the little boy's grave was a family,mom,dad,and 2 little girls. They were playing and barbecuing. It was a party for the little boy.
My friend Nancy is buried in San Antonio in a tony part of town which is funny because I tell her now that she lives in a much better neighborhood now. The place is called a Memorial Park. There are stately mausoleums and towering palm trees. There are statues of great beauty and magnitude. But if you leave something on the grave it will be removed and tossed away at the end of the month. There are no little toys on the graves of the Children here.There are no parties being held there.

Let's all take a minute to remember our loved ones who have gone before us.


Yahoo! Avatars